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It’s important to set someone straight, right? You need to be clear about your position and debate with someone else to prove your point, right? You can’t let someone get away with a wrong opinion without informing them they are wrong, right?

Unfortunately, it’s not right. When someone believes what they believe and resists new information, every attempt to set them straight really just cements their position and their belief that they can’t let a new idea take hold. If you think about a fight, when one person pushes another or hits them – the person either pushes back, or recoils in horror. It doesn’t encourage someone to move toward you, or toward your position.

And you expend energy being upset. Being frustrated. Feeling helpless or defeated because you just can’t make someone who has an opposing view see that they are wrong. You might have facts, data, and information to the contrary to prove your point, but hard as you try, the person you are arguing with just digs their heels in de...

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